MDS: Yesterday, Barley, you told us about “fetching” the Robinson’s pet parrot. Any other pet stories?
Barley: I’m used to being around cats; my care person has several, and they’re pretty cool. But the Robinsons have this really grumpy black cat that weighs about twenty pounds. Every time I try to say “hello†or play with it, it swats me in the nose with its claws. Plus, it catches a rat or a mouse once in a while and leaves body parts lying on the rug, which I think is just plain rude.
MDS: What’s the best thing about being a rent-a-dog?
Barley: Well, I really do like to meet new people and dogs. This way, I have my care person and three other owners. And they all take me for walks sometimes, so I guess I get to meet four times as many people and dogs as most dogs.
MDS: What has been the worst thing about being a rent-a-dog?
Barley: There’s this incredibly beautiful, sexy French Poodle who lives next door to Mr. Martin. I can talk to her through the chain link fence; we even sniff and lick each other’s noses sometimes. I absolutely fell in love with her. We talked about making puppies, which I’m not sure I’m able to do any more. But we talked about it. So my heart just aches when Thursday morning comes and the van comes to take me back to my care person.
MDS: How does being a rent-a-dog work with your toys.
Barley: Oh, man. You just had to bring that up. Lots of people don’t realize this, but many dogs have a favorite toy that works like a child’s “security blanket.†It like a pacifier. It’s a toy that a dog falls in love with. In my case, my favorite toy is a soft stuffed thing that looks like a big bone. It’s something Mrs. Thompson bought at a pet store. I really love that bone. I keep it close to me all day every Friday, and it helps me relax in the evening. By the time I go to bed, I’m totally relaxed and I just sleep like a log. It’s the best sleep I ever get. But it’s only on Friday nights. I really miss that bone the rest of the week.
MDS: Do you ever play ball with your renters?
Barley: I really like to play with tennis balls, because they feel soft in my mouth. Mrs. Robinson always has a few tennis balls around, and she tries to play catch with me, which is fun. But she can’t throw worth a damn. Mr. Martin and Mrs. Thompson wouldn’t know a ball if it hit them between the eyes.
MDS: What are some other good things about being a rent-a-dog?
Barley: Well, I know I’m making all my renters happy. I do feel good about that. It doesn’t work for them to have a full-time dog, so I’m glad I can cheer them up a little. It’s something I feel good about.
MDS: How would you feel about being adopted by one of your renters?
Barley: I’d feel good if it was Mr. Martin. I love the three-mile walks and the premium beef. I’d hate to be cooped up in Mrs. Thompson’s apartment. And it’s fun to sleep with the Robinsons, but that’s really the only good thing that happens to me on Sundays.
MDS: Barley, it’s been great to talk with you. You can have the final word.
Barley: Well, being a rent-a-dog isn’t all it’s cracked up to be – at least for the dog. But all things considered, I’d rather be a rent-a-dog than out there working trash cans for food like I was before they rescued me. But it would be really nice to have just one home with someone who loves me and understands what it means to be the alpha animal.
